Things I Would Tell My Kids Which My Parents Never Did

1. The heart is the most fragile part of the anatomy and the mouth is the most powerful
Since a lot of people have died of a broken heart, you can kill people as easily as using your mouth by saying something hurt. Forget that semi-automatic M16 or bomb or deadly virus!

2. Don’t make people fall in love with you
Unless you’re ready to catch them when they really fall. So be careful when investing your feelings on people. You can't just hit and run!

3. People can be so cold sometimes
There are times when you smile at them, they don’t smile back at you. But since smiling is a good trick for the brain to produce chemicals (serotonin, noradrenaline, dopamine, etc) to boost mood and reduce anxiety - and it’s free, do always smile without expecting the same smile in return.

4. Life is not easy
There are always bills to pay, even if you’re a millionaire. Your private jets constantly need fuel and your chateau needs new carpets every now and then.

5. Your loved ones are the most capable of hurting you
Even on a bad day, the dogs you feed every day can possibly bite you.

6. Remember to stretch out a safety net, put on a helmet, a mask, and an oxygen tank before you jump and fall deep in love
The saying “love like you never love before” is bullshit!

7. There are no such things as unconditional love
Face it, you’ll always have to meet certain measurements to be loved (better). Even all religion beliefs teach you only the good go to heaven and the bad go to hell.

8. Be good to your Dad
Cause the reason he’s still with me all along raising you is YOU. Whatever feelings he had for me were gradually gone when I lost my interest in sex during the second month of my first pregnancy.

9. Be thankful to your exes
Cause they all somehow leave a mark in your heart - though it's only a tiny, almost invisible dot.

10. Like it or not, you will have to kiss many frogs before finally kissing a prince/princess.
There are life lessons - even in kissing frogs, so take out your note and pay well attention to pass them!

11. Happiness is a curse
When you’re too happy, sooner or later you wont be happy or less happy than before. That’s why they say: “the wheel is turning” or “with the sweet there comes the sour”. So never be too happy, though sometimes you earn it. Medium happy is good! (It also goes when you’re sad)

12. There is always someone find you attractive when you’re already in a relationship
But none when you’re single and desperate.

13. The art of losing isn’t hard to master
So many things seem filled with the intent to be lost that their loss is no disaster. So grow no attachment to all your belongings anyhow!

14. The first sexual experience is never good
So don’t expect too much.

15. Girls, beware of 28-year-old men!
Experience has it 3 out of 5 females have been hurt by men at that age. This is because 28-year-old men are like yo-yos and keep changing their minds. One time they see a future with you having a baby together and the next time they only see themselves going to a nude bar. Actually they still need to entertain themselves (as they usually have started earning good money) that requires more personal freedom. Boys, when you're 28 never ask any girl to marry you! Ever! You're not sure yet what settling down is all about.

16. You will always be judged by others all of your life

17. Keep one or two or a few (but not too many) good friends with you at handy
They're very useful to get through all the ups and downs of growing up and when you're old (especially if you're all alone), you'll always have someone to help you wipe your ass.

18. There are things you don't need to try to understand
Like how someone you used to be very close to can someday turn to a perfect stranger.

19. Deaths can cause anger sometimes

20. "I love you" comes with a lot responsiblities
Say it only when you mean it and are ready to bear all the responsibilities needed.

21. There is a certain phase of breaking up from a relationship
when you feel you're never gonna find someone better than your recent ex, no matter how fucked up she/he has been. But don't worry, cause most probably you will!

22. If you ever get married, forget those flower girls and ring bearer boy
They would only shift the attention from you - especially the bride! I don't think you want some kids to steal your thunder after all the money-sucking rented wedding attires and make-up you've paid for the big day, right?