Terminal

Seventeen long months since I last saw you, it's still not getting easier to drag my feet along Terminal 2D of Soekarno-Hatta Airport. Like the world's meanest con guarded with maximum security, as soon as I get off the cab with a suitcase to wherever, my feet were like being forcefully chained to a pair of gigantic metal balls. It felt heavy and painful at the same time.

Like the scar you left me with, even after these seventeen long months.

Every meter square of each floor tile seems to mock me as I poked my heels on it. It screams at the top of its lungs how my steps are out of tune without yours. Like a bad song adored by teenage girls worldwide, just because it's sung by a pretty-looking boy that can't even hum.

Your footsteps and mine were there. On those red-brick tiles. Clean or dirty, I can't remember, for I only concentrated on your walking beside me. We walked hand in hand for the first time twenty one months ago. On those same ugly red-brick tiles. Only I was as happy as any naive girl could be.

Every pair of eyes that envying me walking beside you was so intoxicating. Cause you were so beautiful. Even after a 14-hour flight.

* * *

After seventeen long months, I have tried to put myself out there as stupid self-help books crowding my bed suggest. But one little smile they threw at me, I instantly compared them to you.

Yours is still the most divine I've ever seen.