Dear P (Another Unsent Item)

Hi, P! It's me again. I wanted to tell you that although it wasn't in my weekend plan, I finally went to our little secret place again last weekend - that open-air patio between flowery trees where we used to sit on its staircase and just talk the night away. I didn't remember there was a small pond in the middle of the patio. Do you? I don't know if it's just my lousy memory or I was always too busy enjoying your company that I only had eyes for you.

Do you remember the last time we were there, it was a full moon night decorated with a few stars above and gentle breezes around? If God had wanted to end my life, I would've chosen that particular occasion. I was so loved and happy and safe and warm and comfortable and content, that I didn't mind dying and going to hell that way.

Those twin orange buildings have been turned into a shopping mall, by the way. But it's good, though, they didn't take away our little secret place. And I was also glad when I saw a bunch of teenagers carrying on our little habit at that place. I seemed like feeling your presence when I looked at them simply sitting around and talking the night away at that little patio of ours.

On the way back from a karaoke last night, I also passed your apartment - our little love nest. Ever since I could manage to take that street where you used to live again, whenever I'm in front of that pink painted building, I always drive slowly just to have a quick look at A1/C8 on the 6th floor. It's been occupied by another tenant because the lights were on when I saw it from outside. I hope whoever staying there now, they would find happiness like we did.

I don't know how many more tenants after you left that 2-greenish-bedroom apartment, but I bet neither of them has ever switched all the lights off, taken a sofa out to the balcony, fixed 2 glasses of whatever fruit juice mixed with whatever vodka could be found at some hypermarket nearby. Yes, I bet neither of them has ever sat on a sofa and drunk heavenly Screw Drivers and gazed at the starless, polluted night sky, and yet felt like seeing the Orange Colored Sky. But we mostly gazed at that giant digital clock at the top of a nearby building, didn't we? Do you remember how we both cursed at the clock for ticking too quickly? (Clocks did always tick much too quickly whenever we're together and I always died a little everytime we said goodbye!)

All too soon
We had to part
The moment you had touched my heart
And with you went my dream
All too soon

All too sweet
Was our affair
And you put all the sweetness there
What a shame that it’s gone
All too soon

I knew the strange delights
That only you in love could bring
And as I reached the heights
The bottom fell from everything

You should know as well as I
Our love deserves another try
For we whispered goodbye
All too soon
Too soon

There, the First Lady of Song on my CD player is singing that beautiful piece with her voice so beautiful that it's giving me chills! Yes, I wish the sky would've fallen down on me when we sat there at the patio, then maybe I didn't have to listen to your goodbye. I hate that word, don't you know that?